Children
Children
Relationship breakdown and children
During the emotional time of relationship breakdown it is not unusual to forget about how your children are feeling. Perhaps the most important thing to recognise is that relationship breakdowns are a process, not a single one-off event. Children are affected by their parents' separation for the rest of their lives, not just for the few months while the separation is taking place. From now on, all of family life will always be different.
Agreement
Most parents come to an agreement about the arrangements for their children although difficulties do arise frequently, especially when emotions are running high. These voluntary arrangements between parents are more likely to succeed in the long run than those imposed by the courts. So it is generally understood that the courts will not intervene unless it is in the best interests of the child. Your children, like the courts, would prefer you both to do your utmost to put them first, to see things through their eyes. Mediation may be offered as an alternative to the court process and details are given below.
Children in the Divorce process
When filing for divorce, a Statement of Arrangements has also to be filed, giving details of the proposed arrangements for the children. If these are agreed by both of you, the court is unlikely to interfere although you can ask for the court to help at any time. If agreement has not been reached, the Judge may ask for you both to attend a hearing to see if you can agree. Mediation may again be advised. Reports could be requested and further meetings probably with the children in attendance at a CAFCASS (court welfare) office or at home. See below for further details. This is best discussed with your solicitor.
What happens if things go wrong
What happens if things go wrong with your agreement or you can't agree?
The first stage is for an application to be made on a standard form giving brief details about the background.
The court will then usually fix a brief hearing to decide how the application should move forward. At court, there may be an opportunity for you and the other parent (if the dispute is between the child's parents) to discuss the problem with a CAFCASS officer.
The judge will make orders about how the case is to proceed, perhaps asking a court welfare officer to prepare a report and deciding what evidence is needed for the final hearing.
If a CAFCASS officer is asked to prepare a report, then he or she will arrange to meet you and the other parent separately, and sometimes with the child, before preparing the report. This is normal practice in residence disputes.
The judge can also make interim orders about the children to regulate arrangements until the final hearing.
Both parents (or whoever else is a party to the dispute) must attend court. You should not bring your child with you to court unless the court directs you to do so.
Orders
There are many types of orders which the Children Act 1989 empowers the court to make. The main ones for parents to consider are set out below.
Orders may be made about children under 16 upon:
- either parent applying to the court;
- an application by others (eg grandparents) in specific cases; or
- the court itself without anyone making an application.
- The orders which regulate private arrangements for children are:
a residence order;
a contact order; and
other orders
- prohibited steps - used to prevent a specific course of action taking place.
- specific issue orders - used to decide a specific question about the upbringing of a child
These orders are set out in section 8 of the Children Act 1989 and are sometimes referred to as the "section 8 orders".
The court can also make a parental responsibility order - These orders are usually made to give an unmarried father parental responsibility.
Contact Details
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